To Smile Or Not To Smile

I renewed my driver's license today after several minutes of mind-
numbing chit-chat with an employee at the DMV. (Turns out even if there is no line and you have all the correct documents, they'll still find a way to keep you there for 20 minutes.) On my way there I resolved two things. First, I would smile for my new picture. Every picture of my face on every I.D. I've ever had, my right eyebrow is cocked in a sarcastic expression that does not include a toothy smile. It's taken me this long to figure out that my natural expression ("This old thing? I only wear this when I don't care what I look like.") is one of sarcastic bemusement. This explains what people wrote in my high school yearbooks ("I will miss your vile sarcasm. Stay cool.") and why my good friend Lynn at the Church Office Building assumed I am a "woman's libber and all." (The photo on the left is my COB I.D. photo - not my audition photo for the next installment of "The Grudge." The photo on the right is my old driver's license. I could produce more evidence, but that would mean cleaning out a drawer.)

The second resolution I made was to demand a retake of my photo if I didn't like the first one. As I sat waiting to get my picture taken I observed a man with a disheveled appearance insist on three retakes of his driver's license photo. He made the same face for all three photos. He didn't adjust his collar. He didn't comb his fresh-from-the-roller-coaster hair into something more appropriate of a 50+ man getting pulled over for driving by himself in the H.O.V. lane. This, of course, strengthened my resolve to ask for a second chance. Surprise, for my first take of the driver's license photo, my right eyebrow was up and I had a non-smile (see above). I blame Tanya, the chatty DMV employee who was behind the camera listing all the reasons I should come back (IN FIVE YEARS) on Christmas Eve to renew my license next time. I asked for and got a retake.

Also, I voted today! And I went to the mailbox (in my car) for the first time in three days. The snow plows have been scooting snow to the side of the streets for days. I'm not going to stand in four feet of snow to retrieve my daily credit card advertisements.